How I Spent my Weekend Vacation
(my favorite sign in the Bahamas)
A few months ago I decided to book a trip for me and my significant other (for argument's sake, let's call her Kristen) for a weekend in the Bahamas. The months flew by and last week, while checking out the website for our little weekend vacation, we found out that our hotel was hosting the "Michael Jordan Celebrity Golf Classic".
Awesome!
So, here is a list of the celebs that we saw, along with a brief blurb.
Michael Jordan- the big man himself was the first person we saw. he had just finished up a round and was walking with some guy carrying his clubs... one second sooner and he would have knocked us down turning the corner by hotel entrance. We also saw him in the casino many time, which should come as no surprise.
Amahd Rashad- We saw him wearing a goofy hat buying cigars with Charles Oakley
Charles Oakley- wearing the same goofy bucked hat in the cigar store... Oak was also seen a few times at the craps table. he was loud and fun. Unlike LT
Lawrence Taylor- Saw him playing $15 Caribbean Stud with a cigar in his hand and a sour look on his face. We were looking for his Super Bowl ring, but realized that it was on some crack dealer somewhere.
Lawrence Taylor- Saw him playing $15 Caribbean Stud with a cigar in his hand and a sour look on his face. We were looking for his Super Bowl ring, but realized that it was on some crack dealer somewhere.
Charles Barkley- Had the ladies all over him at the blackjack table
Roger Clemens & wife- she took my spot at a $25 blackjack table after I got my ass kicked. Roger was standing over me like impending death. He's bad luck.
Derek Jeter- cheap-ass tool... playing $15 blackjack. Surrounded by men that I assume he will be pleasuring later on in the evening.
Jim Brown- I thought this guy found religion... but he was drinking, smoking a stogie, and gambling at a high roller table
Fat Joe - This guy had a diamond the size of a 90 year old man's prostate in his ear (as opposed to Jeter who just had a prostate in his ear.
Phil Gordon - he was always around the casino. he was always hanging with David Schwimmer. I feel like I personally know Gordon because I have run in to him at least a half-dozen times at casinos.
David Schwimmer- at first I had respect for this dude because he was hanging with Gordon. Then we walked through our lobby and saw him hanging on a couch with 5 18 year old girls literally bouncing up and down in front of him while he had his most annoying "Ross" face on. I hated him for many reasons.
John McEnroe- Saw the Mac walking through the casino while I was playing craps. I glanced over and caught a glimpse. At the same table, some girl said that Tom Brady was like 15 feet away, but I didn't see him, so I don't count that.
Terrell Owens- Just walking through the casino.... the less anyone says about TO, the better
Cedric The Entertainer- we saw him the most. he was all over the place dressed in his all white linen outfit with white kangol hat. one night at dinner we saw him with his family and some other posse members. Including....
Vince Coleman- yeah, thats right, he is now part of Cedric's posse. To be honest, the only way I recognized him was because his picture was in the program for the golf outing.
Alan Thicke- with a hot blonde that i assume to be his wife, or granddaughter walking out of Nobu, Atlantis. While doing research on how to spell his name, i laughed my ass off at his site. (turn your speakers down)
I should start writing for US Weekly... or Gawker
Alan Thicke- with a hot blonde that i assume to be his wife, or granddaughter walking out of Nobu, Atlantis. While doing research on how to spell his name, i laughed my ass off at his site. (turn your speakers down)
I should start writing for US Weekly... or Gawker
posted by maybe i can help... @ 8:59 AM
10 Comments:
Sounds like quite a trip. Much more interesting than my recent trip to Boca Raton where I inadvertantly attended a Septegenarian Singles Night and almost got my freak on with Blue Iris. That's right, in my innagural comment on this blog, I used the word "Septegenarian." So this is what The Schwizz is all about?? Very nice. Let's Go Mets!
Of all those sightings, I think I would most have liked to see a picture of Schwimmer. I'm just picturing that "Ross face" in a sea of boobies. Must have been funny stuff.
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What are you talking about? The Pallbearer? With Gwyneth Paltrow? We're talking CLASSIC American cinema.
David Schwimmer is a dick. I hated him on friends. I hated him on celebrity poker. And I hate him in his movies, not that I can name any without looking at IMDB. Man, I wish I saw him in a casino, so I could get drunk and yell derogatory comments his way all night.
But Alan Thicke, he's the best. And his web site rocks.
Also, obviously you've never seen his nuanced performance in "Breast Men."
What I was wondering is why would he be making the pathetic Ross Face if he's surrounded by some hot young tail? BTW, the Vince Coleman sighting is great. I still remember his speech to the media in '93 following the firecracker incident, which began, "Most people doesn't know athletes." and contained the classic lamentation, "I have not slept, nor have I been able to sleep." I miss VC.
Did you know...
(1) On April 26, 1993, Dwight Gooden hurt his shoulder when he was struck by a golf club Coleman was swinging in the clubhouse?
(2) The firecracker incident happened on July 24, 1993, the same day on which Anthony Young lost his 27th decision in a row?
(3) Coleman was eventually traded away from the Mets in 1994 for none other than Kevin McReynolds? I didn't even remember this schmuck had a second stint on the Mets. Maybe I just blacked out the entire period of 1991 through 1995. Dark days indeed, though perhaps not as dark at the 2002 - 2010 period will be for the NY Knicks.
Nothing will ever top Hostess v. Drakes.
excellent stuff. we used to work on that tourney, and that is by far one of the best most diverse celebrity golf tourneys out there today. i am surprised you didnt see an Angie Everhart sighting where she blows the entire tourney. Great post. I think this might top our hostess v. drakes debate.
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